How to Date a Cougar Woman

Deciding that you're ready to date a cougar is the first step into a new dating arena. The rules are pretty much the same as dating younger chicks, but there are a lot of subtle differences that we'll try to help you with in this short but sweet web guide.

Where to find a cougar date?

So you're ready to date a cougar but where are you going to find her? Sure, you see potential cougars everywhere, on the subway, in the supermarket, on the bus, at the mall - but are they really cougars? Or are they just hot older chicks with angry husbands waiting to kick your ass?

If you're a fearless cougar hunter please go ahead and take your chances by approaching the next hot older woman you see in public. It's a risky business though and you're on your own because this guide into how to date a cougar steers clear of such unreliable methods.

Here we recommend the two proven places to meet a cougar woman: 1). the bar and 2). online dating sites.

Finding a cougar to date in a bar should be fairly straightforward. More and more cougars are heading into bars and clubs to check out the young cougarbait on offer. So go find them, and when you do, be confident, be cool and remember the reason most cougars are looking for a younger man is because they're bored of the slipper wearing, couch potato guys of their own age. That's why you have to exude energy, fun and sexual appetite if you want to secure a date with a cougar in a bar.

Online dating is also a great tool in your quest to date a cougar. The benefit of online dating is that you get to sound out your cougar for a while first by swapping messages and maybe even photos. You can really get an idea of what your cougar woman is looking for and make sure that if you do go on a date with her, you're likely to be on the same wavelength. The drawback of course is that you don't know how realistic the photos of your cougar really are. You want an older woman but you don't want a shrivelled up prune, right? So there's a balance to be struck and when you date a cougar based on pictures alone you take a chance. But then again, nothing ventured, nothing gained!

Securing your date with a cougar

When you're first talking to your cougar (either online or in the 'real world') it pays to remember that no two cougars are the same. Just like girls in their 20s, cougar women vary enormously in what they are looking for from a man.

Some may want a boyfriend - possibly a fit young guy to have on her arm. Now consider...are you ready to be a trophy boytoy? If so then this may be the cougar for you, and the way to secure a date with this kind of cougar is to demonstrate you have long term potential as boyfriend material. Before you approach your target cougar, think about possible ways you can demonstrate value as a potential boyfriend - namely focus on your conversation topics and make sure you stay away from dumbass behavior like discussing your favorite football team. Show that you've got brains as well as youth on your side and you have a much better chance of securing your date with a cougar.

On the other hand, there are a whole bunch of cougars out there who are simply after a good time with a younger guy - a chance to relive their youth and inject some fun back into their lives after 20 years married to a boring old fart. Most guys are looking to date a cougar like this - a hot older chick who's a bit of a good time girl at heart and wants to have some fun with a capital F. The key to bagging your cougar date in this scenario is to keep it light. Avoid the classic serious topics such as religion and politics. Instead talk about some fun things you've been doing lately and especially if they happen to be active sports like surfing, snowboarding or skating. They'll love the idea that you're a fit young guy who knows how to enjoy himself.

One final piece of advice when it comes to getting your date with a cougar - don't ruin the vibe by talking about the age gap like it's some kind of sexual fantasy that you want to explore. Lines like 'yeah, I've always wanted to go with an older babe' are pretty much guaranteed to put you out of the game. Unless of course you have the skill to deliver the line with the right level of ironic humor and sexiness that gets their palms (or is that paws?) sweating.

Where to take a cougar on your first date

There's no big secret to this one. For a first date, it's always a safe bet to go for either a drink or a meal. If you choose to date a cougar who you met online and therefore haven't spoken to much (if at all) it's a good idea to take her to a bar for your first date. You don't want to commit to a whole two or three hour meal with a much older woman if you haven't seen her in person. The sad fact is that she may not look much like her photo, and in that case your dinner date could be one of the most awkward nights of your young life. So go instead to a quiet bar where you can get to know her properly, rather than to a packed out club where you have to shout to be heard. And remember to avoid bars that your friends may be at - that could be a major distraction to you and your cougar.

If you do opt for a dinner date, remember to watch your table manners! Cougar women may be hot mature chicks looking for fun, but they also grew up in an age where manners were emphasised more, so watch your elbows on the table, talking with your mouth full, and of course it's best to avoid the spaghetti.

Finally, just because she's older and probably has more money (thanks to her excellent divorce lawyer) never assume your cougar date should pay for the meal. If she really insists, let her pay but always be first to get the wallet out and show that you want her for who she is (body and mind) not what she can do for you. Play it right and your date with a cougar could turn into a night you'll remember for a long time to come.

Comments

I couldn't have said it better myself...;-)

[Crystal W.]

OMG,
Internet dating sites should make this article required reading for the cougar prey members. I can't tell you how many young studs with great potential, I've talked to who just don't get it, that unlike most other dating, cougar dating is not "all about them" getting their rocks off, and fulfilling their fantasies. Cougar dating is about reciprocity, quid pro quo, and both parties getting their needs taken care of. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten excited in anticipation and been bored to tears listening to them go on about sports, talk about themselves, brag about their sexual prowess, and reveal their idealistic naivete about politics & religion. Cougar hunting requires a degree of finesse and not all young men have developed this. Cougars be advised, there are many using this new, popular dating type as an excuse to forego the normal polite protocol of regular dating, the effort it requires, and get laid on the cheap. It's an excuse that allows them to be a rude, crude, mannerless pigs. On the other hand, I've been refreshed and delighted by some of the young men I've met, a twenty something marine with a delicious tall, lean deer rifle body, who's been to war and should be jaded, but somehow retains his innocence about women. He's an uncomplicated diamond in the rough, completely unaware of his charms, and totally disarmed when I flirt with him in an erotic, playful way. He's just so cute I could eat him up. Then there's the 30 something Russian Art Director, who has a degree in biochemistry. English is his second language, but he's quite adept at holding an intellectual conversation in it. This guy is so smart, knowledgeable, cultured, subtle, refined, polite, and gentlemanly that his degree of polish could probably bring on an a climax. Both of these men, though polar opposites, inspire a level of arousal in me, that I haven't felt since my teens.

[S.]

I am involved with a man 17 years younger than myself. He attented high school with my children! I am really having an issue with the age thing. It doesn't seem to bother him and honestly it didn't bother me until we began having sex. Don't get me wrong the sex is great, but I feel terrible after he leaves. I'm not sure where to go from here.
On one hand I can't stop thinking about how wonderful he is and on the other hand I think I'm nuts! Help!
To make things worse my children have NO idea and will probably never be able to look at me again when they do find out.
I'm not ready to give this relationship up, but I'm also not ready for it to develope into something more serious.
Any suggestions??

[Cougar Beauty Secrets]

Very nice article... I enjoyed it very much!

[Carmen]

great discussion, here's a great vid i just found with tips for cougar dating http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/f864dd6cf8

[date a cougar]

Cougar hunting requires a degree of finesse and not all young men have developed this. Cougars be advised, there are many using this new, popular dating type as an excuse to forego the normal polite protocol of regular dating, the effort it requires, and get laid on the cheap

[Barbara]

Great article. I am 52 dating a man 32 for the last 2 years. He is college educated, articulate, adorable and able to be in a great 50/50 attention/interests relationship. We met through a mutual interest and while the age concerned us at first now, we never even think about it. We live together now and have no intention of parting ways. I say go for it!

[Lori]

I started flirting with a young 40, married with 6 kids...he wasn't enjoying his marriage at all, but I found that I thought about him a lot. We would see each other occasionally, TXTm talk on the phone, and have lunch...so far so good..he knew the rules, that he was a want more than a need. All was well then he started behaving like a boy. Not TXTing back, no answers, no calls...I decided big boys are usually easier and at least display better manners. He has now been deleted from my cell phone.

[Daryl Dorsey]

Very interesting article. I enjoyed reading it and picked up alot of tips.

[ryan]

i liked your artical and look forward to using this info on my next date

[Ringo]

Hi my name is ringo and i'm looking for a cougar, i'm 24 and i need an older woman who is going to show me the ropes. Please send me a photo and details of your measurements